nori76 I was reading a book on âprocrastinationâ and found it interesting that the key to dealing with procrastination is âself-compassionâ. The theory is that people who tend to procrastinate are often âself-criticalâ or â[perfectionism (psychology)â, which leads them to think, âIâm so badâ or âI canât produce at this levelâ when, for example, their work is not going well. This leads to procrastination.
I am also a procrastinator, and this mechanism is very applicable to me. Iâve been saying âIâm not good enoughâ less and less lately, but âI canât deliver thisâ is quite common, and when Iâm in that mode, I procrastinate a lot.
This kind of logic is why compasition is indeed important. Iâve learned to practice it without realizing it, and Iâve reduced my âfatalâ procrastination since my mid-30s.
The key there was to not make compaction a big theme. Itâs hard to achieve something like âimproving self-assurance,â but itâs easy to do something small and concrete like âI was able to reply to one email! It is easy to praise small, concrete accomplishments like âI got one reply to my email! Iâve been doing this repeatedly, and before I knew it, I was able to use a âself-compassionâ mode, and it certainly seems to have reduced my procrastination. So, I have recently studied the theoretical model of this and it has become very clear to me.
nori76 The book I am reading is this one that I have mentioned before. It is a good book and I hope a Japanese translation will be published!
yukimitsumugiya I think procrastination and self-compassion are really related. When I learned about the relationship between procrastination and feelings of guilt, I encountered the psychological logic of âI procrastinate because I want to think that I am still better off by having guilt about procrastination, I once found that if I kept a praise diary, my procrastination behavior naturally disappeared.
yukimitsumugiya Iâve been doing some research to improve my resolution on âProcrastination, Guilt, and Self-Compassionâ and found that procrastination is a dopamine-dependent behavior. I found out that procrastination is a dopamine-dependent behavior. In the end, it all comes down to brain science. ⊠Procrastination is often seen as ânot taking action,â but itâs the act of procrastinating.
yukimitsumugiya The seemingly illogical and mysterious behavior of procrastinating in order to feel guilty can also be explained by the fact that the procrastination was done in order to feel dopamine. I can explain it by saying that I was procrastinating to feel dopamine.
nori76 As you can read in Watkinsâ book, for example, when you donât finish the work that is due tomorrow, and you keep thinking âHow bad I am,â and you donât get to the work in front of you, and you keep looking at your phone, it actually works as ârewardâ in the sense that you âdetachâ from the painful reality of not finishing the work. When you avoid doing so, it actually functions as a ârewardâ in the sense that you can âget awayâ from the painful reality of not being able to finish your work. So it gets âlearnedâ.
Of course, if you donât finish the work, you will be scolded the next day, and in the long run this is a disadvantage rather than a reward, but in the short run the reward is that you can âescape reality.
Not all people are like this, but I think it makes a lot of sense to me that the feelings of âI hate myself for worrying so much and procrastinating so muchâ are actually a reward for learning these patterns, and thatâs why I think solving problems of the mind is so difficult. I think thatâs why itâs so difficult to solve the problem of the mind. Itâs very ambivalent.
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