On 2012-11-10, blog post was mentioned on Twitter 6 years later (Social Triggers), so I went back to read it again and found it useful even now (Test of Time). I read it again and found it still useful (Test of Time), so I am reprinting it here. The manuscript you are referring to here as “I have to write it” is Technology Supporting Coding.
I was reading the book “The mind is sick… - Useful Early Buddhist Dharma Talks <2>” as an escape from reality, saying “I have to write a manuscript,” and I found some words that stuck in my mind. It is not an exact quote, so if you want to know the exact words, please read p.60 to p.3.
- The reason people lose confidence is that they have too much confidence.
- When one thinks he or she can finish this level of work in a jiffy, but it doesn’t work out when he or she actually does it, one loses confidence.
- You think, “I’m going to give an outstanding speech,” and then you actually don’t speak well, and you lose confidence.
- The delusional self is too wonderful to be true, so it tries to behave the way its “delusional wonderful self” behaves and suffers because it can’t.
- The reason you say, “I’m not confident in my work,” is because you have delusions in your head of miraculous success. You can only do what you can do in reality. You can only do what you can do. Aim for a state in which you feel that you have done your best.
After all, I had too much confidence (in myself) and a false self-image that I could write smoothly if I wanted to. However, when I actually started writing, I struggled and could not finish it in the scheduled time. Then, in order to distract themselves from the “inconvenient truth,” they unconsciously avoid writing itself. This is how so-called “escapism” occurs.
Early Buddhism seems to have a life-hack aspect of how to control these “bad feelings”. Interesting.
2012-11-10 #201211-102012-11
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